Instead of writing blog entries on an individual page, it will all be here now!
03/09/25
Hiiii, i started japanese classes!!! Ive only taken one so far but we do progress fast in 2 hours!!! Its only 2 hours a week every tuesday, but i think its great!!! also by the end of it i start to get tired so yeah, pretty good time.
I watched the private life of sherlock holmes on valentines day! with my cat. Fun movie, I liked it. I liked the performance of the actor playing holmes. I do think that mycroft was too active but alright.
I hate how i start sounding mean and blunt when im overwhelmed. I dont know what to do about it. If im overwhelmed I cant think clearly what i have to say. And realizing I probably sound mean just makes me feel worse and get overwhelmed even faster.
Did I talk about how i inherited my aunt's books? She unfortunately passed away quite young. I saw her in the hospital a few days or weeks before she passed away. She didnt seem too bad, and even told me that she would get better after i started crying. I dont know if she lied to console me. I dont care to know actually. Those details about death shouldnt be dwelled on too much. She was really great in life. Very active. A great entrepeneur. And i felt very close to her. I remember all times i spent with her fondly. It is a shame i didnt know she liked Sherlock Holmes until some months prior to her passing, but I inherited her books and found some books about Holmes methods. How to think like Sherlock Holmes, The deduction guide, and The sherlock holmes handbooks. I havent picked up all the books yet as it was a really huge collection the one she had, but i wonder if ill find more on sherlock holmes. Funny how i saw the sherlock holmes handbook in a book fair, and i wanted to buy it but i prefered to get carmilla instead. And that book found its way to me later!!! How curious is that! Also in her collection there were 3 Victor Hugo books of theatre from 1850! Theyre in french so i cant read them YET. After i master japanese ill learn french to read those books. It is a romance language so it shoulnt be too hard to learn. She had many history books.
It makes me sad that I cant attend to sherlockian events because there isnt any happening in the country i live in!! Id love to atternd 221b con but im not in the US!! And even if i could go the US isnt a good place to visit right now. And it is a shame that i dont know where to find other sherlockians because when im talking about sherlock holmes talking becomes so much easier!!!! Well i think ill end this entry. Goodbye!!!!
02/13/25
Soooo ive decided i will enter an online school. It doesnt have classes, im given the material and instructions and then i just send the work. Im in the process of inscription. Im also on the process of inscription to japanese classes. Those will be in person. Exiting. I feel suffocated being always with my mom. I hate having to ignore that i like women. We both know but its something we must ignore and pretend that i could like men. She doesnt think its something that can be reversed but thinks it should be repressed. I didnt tell her but she could tell by the way i talked about a friend. I had no problem with not talking about it with her when i could talk about that part of me with some friends but now i cant ever express that part of me and it feels suffocating. I dont understand how she claims to not be a part of society and frecuently talks about how time and language are man made concepts but at the same time is so weird about gender norms??? Why is she so rigid about that? As if those werent made up concepts too. I feel jealous of people who can discuss crushes with their parents. It would be nice to talk about the things ive loved about crushes. I hope she eventually realizes how insignificant gender is. I miss being able to talk about those things and not feeling shame. Might propose a call to a friend later. Im feeling lonely.
01/24/25
I like to think that all that im living right now is just my backstory, and eventually life will become more interesting for me. Im still young!!! And I know that Im in charge of making my life better, but I do try!!! As much as i can really, I join art projects, I started a translation project. I probably have more skills than the average teen my age. But my life is just not interesting. My life is so pathetic that i get exited about going to buy groceries. I feel like ive failed as a teen. I failed at school, the friends I think I have would probably forget about me if i didnt keep texting me, Im extremely scared of changes. At least Im useful for my mom. I dont understand how everyone my age has a best friend. What do i lack that others have?! I listen to people, I share parts of my life, I do weekly check ups on my friends, I remember the details of their conversations. Anyways, when i can im going to get out of the house, go to a park, search for some regular and start talking about something that caught my attention about them. I may be a bit desperate.
01/24/25
Im on episode 176 of the magnus archives. I dont want to finish it!!!!! Its too good!!! And i have no spoilers about the end! Its fantastic! I have no idea how it will end and i dont want to know yet!!! this is incredible!!! Anyways, email me please, im lonelyy. my email is annoying.cat39@gmail.com send me something!! a pet, your window whatever! Im just really lonely. Im making clay figures, drawing, reading, animating, helping my mom with house chores, recording my readings outloud, solving math exercises, playing violin, but its really cold outside and i cant go anywhere so im really lonely. But soon ill be able to go to the park and feel like a ghost again! Because i used to know people that went there but now i dont know anyone that goes there. Does that make sense? Anyways, I still have nightmares about school. I hate them. And i havent had any fun dreams lately! Where are the weird dreams! Now theyre just boring, and scary, and not fun to think about. At least the horrible but not realistic nightmares are fun to think about eventually!
01/18/25
Yesterday I attended the Montague Street Incorregibles zoom meeting of this year and had a superb time! It didnt feel like 7 hours at all. And everyone was so kind! I made an absolute fool of myself at the powerpoint karaoke but everyone was incredibly kind!!!!!!! And i got to hear the tea of older sherlockians. Really cool. And also learned snake facts. it was sooo lovelyyy. Will be attending next year too!
01/14/25
Hey! Soooooo i have a lot to explain kinda? I mean i dont need to. But idk. This is like a register of my personal life. Not a complete one, but still. At the moment im not in school because of some complicated situations, so im helping my mom with chores and will look at schools later this january. Im really lonely and miss academics but if i were to return to education right not im not sure id be able to handle it. I still feel fragile. Right now there isnt much i can do aside from housechores, but our house is small, we finish quite fast and i have a lot of free time. Im still looking for classes i can take during this semester, but I cant find anything in the morning yet. Ill be studying by myself so I dont find it too hard to ajust to classes. I like most of the class subjects, history, spanish, english, biology... Those are really fun to study. Mathemathics and Physics not so much, but ill study those too so i dont forget them. As i said before, Im lonely. So if youre lonely too, or even if youre not and just want a new friend, email me! My email is annoying.cat39@gmail.com soo yeah! Say hi, or send me something you made, or just anything youd like to share! I really like communicating through email. Its my favorite digital medium of communication.
Id like to make a fancy css for this site, and i have time now! So i might.
I like to think of this site as a docummentation of life in the 2020s. For me, and for the world really! I plan to abandon this site on 2030 and make a new one. This will be left as a capsule of the 2020s i guess.
12/26/24
Sooooo the day after christmas! yay! Im a lover of christmas. I like to see gift giving as a test of my knowledge of friends! Its a good way of demostrating that i care and remember what they talk about. I think im great at giving gifts, i always get the strongest reactions when opening the gift. A gift that ill never top is a painting i made of a friends dog. It was for her birthday. Ill never forget how she immediatly recognized the painting as her dog, and how happy she was immediatly after seeing it. And some months later, said dog unfortunately passed away. She thanked me for the painting because it was a way for her and her family to keep seeing their dog daily. She has it hanged besides her bed.
I like that christmas makes people warmer. While I can gift things to anyone, everyday, I like having an specific date. Its like having a deadline! Kind of like having a test on things that the loved one would like. And i know people arent pretending to my gift because their reaction seems more strong and comes faster than their reaction to other gifts. Receiving gifts is also nice, but I much prefer giving gifts.
I also love christmas specials! I love christmas specials, but dont really care about christmas movies, but thats mostly because my mom always chooses romance movies that are very similar. Chrismas specials are definitely my most awaited episodes of any series, and almost always end up being some of my favorite episodes.
I also love seeing fireworks if I have my ears covered. Delightful lights. But i do feel bad for the animals, so i dont fire any myself, just enjoy the ones fired by others.
My least favorite part is the food. its always too greasy and makes my stomach feel bad after. But i do like the desserts.
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